Milk Alien Saga: Part 4

Dec 12 2009

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Previously on “Stoned Encounters with the 3rd Kind” Tom the alien crash landed into the back lot of a cult named the Neon Jello Evangelists and was mistakenly deemed their leader. Tom fell in love with Sandra, but it was short-lived for they were kidnapped by ruthless redneck thugs. Tom couldn’t deal with the memories of the ordeal and left Sandra. He began to live the high life partying it up and had an affair with Barry’s wife. Barry came home to find his wife in bed with Tom and Barry became enraged.

And now the thrilling conclusion to “Stoned Encounters with the 3rd Kind”;

Barry grabs Tom and before he can use his powers to defend himself, Barry violently smashes Tom’s head into the headboard. He continues to bash his head until Tom stops moving. Barry, still enraged, throws Tom’s limp body onto the floor. He places his foot on Tom’s torso and begins to tear off his limbs one by one. He grabs the pile of bloodied limbs and carries them outside to throw them into the courtyard of the colony.

At this point the attendees of the aforementioned party  are just beginning to filter out into the court yard. To their dismay, they witness Barry tossing the pieces of their once whole leader into the courtyard lawn. At first, the crowds reaction is one of complete horror, but then one of the onlookers shouts out, “The great leader’s limbs still hold his power within them!” After a few seconds of confusion and thought processing, suddenly the members of the Neon Jello Evangelists collectively rush for the limbs like a deal hungry crowd unleashed through the doors at Walmart on Black Friday. They trample over each other praying to grab one of their leaders limbs with the hopes that the power possessed within the limb will be bestowed upon its owner. Those that are unable to obtain a limb feverishly barge into Barry and Lisa’s home and rip apart what is left of Tom’s torso and head.The scene could be described as pathetic at best.
A few days after the incident, the Neon Jello Evangelists decide that they must elect a new leader; however, there is no clear choice. After much debate they come to a consensus that those in possession of Tom’s body parts will be elected as members of a high council. This council will oversee and determine the course of all actions within the colony.
 Now a society that once enjoyed a lack of social discrimination based on class structure, became quite the opposite. The egos of those members who possessed one of the former leaders body parts became quite engorged. They walked around with their nose in the air to those who didn’t possess one and much like a lucky rabbits foot, they always carried their alien body part with them. This was not only because it was a status symbol, but also because they knew that any other NJE with two feet and a heartbeat would do anything to get their hands on one of the prized body parts, so an unattended body part was akin to asking for it to be stolen.
The non-possession group, as they were called, started holding secret meetings to discuss plans to over throw the possessors, but before they could carry out their plans, something unimaginable happened.
Tom’s limbs and other body parts, although seemingly inanimate objects, began to take on a life of their own. The possessors were unable to contain the physical power of the alien parts.
Little did they know,  a ship from Tom’s home world had quietly positioned itself over the colony in the middle of the night.
They had come back for Tom.
The ship let loose an array of what appeared to be streams of bright white light. Tom’s body parts leaped up from their motionless state and parted company with their captors. All of the various pieces gathered together in the center of the courtyard under the ship. In a great blast of the light, the parts fused together to take the form of Tom once again.
The NJE’s looked on in astonishment at what they were witnessing. Tom slowly floated up into the ship and as he did he gave the entire group the finger. Before the ship left to return to Tom’s home world, Tom instructed the ship’s captain to nuke the site from orbit. As Tom watched the nuclear blast decimate the colony that he once loved, he whispered under his breath, “Goodbye, and good riddance!”
 Photo Sources: Charlie White


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6 Responses to Milk Alien Saga: Part 4

  1. Angel says:

    haha genius picture! immediately caught my attention

  2. Neon Jello Evangelist says:

    Yeah, they are all great photos, but we have Charlie White to thank for that. There is a link to his photo gallery at the bottom of this post.

  3. Anonymous says:

    I was happy to see tom re form, but was also curious to hear about how the social situation would have played out now that the snobs didn't have their body parts. But i guessed they nuked the site from orbit….its the only way to be sure.

    – Hudson

  4. Neon Jello Evangelist says:

    Explaining how it played out without Tom in the mix would be mostly boring, mostly. So nuking the site from orbit really was the only way to be sure to avoid boredom.

  5. The Chaos says:

    This shit is funny. By the way, I'm following your blog now. Could u please follow mines?

  6. Neon Jello Evangelist says:

    Thanks Chaos. I'll be sure to check out your blog.

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