Bath Jumper

May 19 2009

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HI, NEON JELLO EVANGELIST HERE. Ever wanted to take a bath with your CLOTHES ON? Of course you have, but how without soaking your clothing? Ever feel like it’s just TOO MUCH WORK to undress before bathing? I do all the time. The end result is that I just don’t bathe. Well, now your dreams have come true. Introducing my new BATH JUMPER.

You just slip this ULTRA THIN SUPER SPACE AGE JUMPSUIT over your clothing and JUMP in the bath. It’s just that easy. How much you ask? Well, normally a futuristic item like this would cost you MILLIONS at retail outlets, but if you purchase right now, it will only cost you 4 EASY INSTALLMENTS OF $19.99.

If you call right now, I will throw in my WOOLY LAPTOP JUMPER for warmth and privacy in those COLD PUBLIC SCHOOL HALLWAYS,

Source: Cache Gawker

and my HAIR JUMPER to keep your hair out of your food when you SLURP UP A BOWL OF DELICIOUS WON TON NOODLE SOUP.

All these items for only 4 EASY INSTALLMENTS OF $19.99. How could you go wrong?

Did I mention the BATH JUMPER can be worn to POST APOCALYPTIC social functions as well?

It’s true, “Silver Head” does “Live”.

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2 Responses to Bath Jumper

  1. ConfuzzedGal says:

    Can i make a purchase with paypal?? I'd like to prevent STDs.. Lol..

  2. Neon Jello Evangelist says:

    Bath jumpers are not a tested defense against STD's, I recommend condoms or abstinence.

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