ANOUNCEMENT: Mind Control Girl on the Loose!

Oct 26 2010

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This is Mind Control Girl. Whatever you do, don’t stare directly into her eyes. She will gain complete control over your mind in nearly the instant that your eyes lock with hers. Once she has control, she will never let go. You will become her puppet. I hear it feels sort of like being anally raped.  She makes people do bizarre things that they would not normally do for her own childish amusement. Here is what happened to one of her victims!

This is Frank. He hates rainbows. Poor Frank.

The mind control girl has an accomplice as well. Not of his own free will of course. He is none other than Bumble Bee Barf Bucket Boy, and his mind is being directed by Mind Control Girl. He may seem harmless, but if you get too close, he starts barfing in that bucket and once he starts he can’t stop. The barf covers the floor of the room within a matter of seconds and you become stuck in it. That’s when mind control girl shows up and forces you to look into her eyes and ensnare yet another victim. Also, the barf smells really bad which also sucks. Take a look at another one of Mind Control Girl’s victims.

This is Cynthia. She hates snails. Poor Cynthia.

This has been an NJE warning about Mind Control Girl and her accomplice Bumble Bee Barf Bucket Boy. If you see either of them, stay as far away from them as you can and contact the appropriate authorities immediately. Thank you, and goodnight.

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2 Responses to ANOUNCEMENT: Mind Control Girl on the Loose!

  1. Anonymous says:

    By your description the barf bucket almost seems superfluous. I cant seem to sms you from my ipod, this angers me.

    –Booger Butt Blindfold Billy

  2. Neon Jello Evangelist says:

    The bucket lulls you into a false sense of security. It makes you think the barf will be contained, so you stick around.

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